But His Penis Doesnt Have A Mustache...

So, I have a friend with a handlebar mustache. He claims its so that people don't take him to seriously. When I heard this, I asked his girlfriend "Does that mean that its MORE appropriate just to laugh when you see his penis?". She just looked at me, dumbfounded, and said "but his penis doesn't have a mustache".

Can you imagine if it did?! What would it look like? Would it be natural or storebought? If it was storebought, what style would it be? bushy, or paper? how would you attach it? tape? string? glue? an acute sense of balance? would it be a tattoo? where would it be? on the sack? on the shaft? sideways? longways?

I HAVE QUESTIONS AND I WANT ANSWERS DAMMIT!!

Just by having a mustache, that man made me wanna look at his penis!
At that moment I realized that my friend is a Sexual Genius!!

 P.S. I am growing a mustache...ladies...

Comfortable Couples

     I think one of the reasons I don't have a good track record with women is because I haven't found someone I'm truly comfortable with yet. Being comfortable is a HUGE part of any relationship. You have to be comfortable with every aspect of that person otherwise things just won't last. A good example is my last girlfriend.
  
  She was uncomfortable with me masturbating. She saw me once, just once, and FREAKED OUT! I don't know why either. Was it the simple fact that I was doing it? Was it how I was doing it?

Was I sitting too close to her on the bus?